Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Just thinking out loud...

Dear Ed,
"When your legs don't work like they used to before"
But what if my legs never really actually worked? Because that's the thing... My body, correction, our bodies, never really have actually been fully functional. Maybe for some of you, you can remember days when your body responded the way you wanted it to every time, and maybe for others, you understand what I'm talking about. 

"When my hands don't play the strings the same way"
Some of you may be sitting there reading this thinking that BYCI (before your chronic illness) your body worked perfectly...
For some reason I could never convince my hands to do the fancy finger picking people associate with artists like Ed Sheeran, Keith Urban, and practically every other artist who possesses the ability to play guitar. I thought it was simply because I didn't try hard enough or practice long enough.
I've always been clumsy, tripping over objects laying in the middle of the floor, running into walls, tripping over invisible objects laying on the floor... I'm sure you get the point. My lack of hand-eye coordination meant that sports were a struggle - eventually something I stopped trying to succeed at.
Looking back things that seemed to be minor problems when I was younger, have become amplified and much more visible now. I'm sure many of you can agree. 

Our bodies, they do what they want, when they want... But you wanna know a secret? 

Your soul..... "Could never grow old, it's evergreen"

Our bodies don't define, they're just the parts people see... The visible body fighting the invisible illness. But your soul, while you don't have control over your body (for the most part), you can control the way you build up and nurture your soul. Just as your appearance doesn't define you, neither does your bodies ability to function. 

Maybe you're legs don't work like they used to. Maybe your legs never worked. Maybe your hands don't play the strings the same way. Maybe your hands could never really play the strings at all. Maybe you're a klutz. Maybe you just lack balance. 

But whatever it is you do or don't have. Whatever it is you can't control... You can control one thing. 

"Will your eyes still smile from your cheeks" 

Take a deep breath. Think happy thoughts. Smile. Remember that no matter how hard today is on your body, that doesn't have to affect your soul. 

°breathe°live°thrive

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

first post...!

Hello there!

Welcome to my blog. The end result of time "wasted" when I can't sleep, or when I feel alone, or when the pain is just to much.

When I want to talk to someone who understands, or when I have some crazy new thought or theory, this is where I turn to.

Being diagnosed or unofficially diagnosed with a chronic illness, is hard at any age, but especially when you still haven't even received a high school diploma. The past few months have been rocky trying to figure out exactly what's wrong with me and what I can do to help prevent the bad days.

So I have a question. In a society that it so dependent on the internet and social media, why are there not more support systems for those of us in the younger generation dealing with chronic illnesses?

I haven't yet found the answer to that question, but I do have a bit of a solution... This blog of course!

If you're interested in finding out more about me or this blog, I would encourage you to read the "about me" feature, and then go check out the "About" tab up on the top. After completing both of those tasks, subscribe to my blog down at the bottom of the page, or maybe even contact me, and stay tuned for more random thoughts, analogies, and mindless wanderings. In the meantime, know that when it seems as if the rest of the world is against you, I understand. I feel your pain. You are NOT alone.